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Deactivate

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Everything posted by Deactivate

  1. Paranoia is often the main perpetrator in depression. My paranoia is so bad that it's second nature to me now. My boyfriend can't go anywhere without me thinking he's up to something, I mean, he's lied to me before so that doesn't help, but in the past I've been cheated on. I always get the feeling that no matter how hard I try or no matter who I'm with, I'll never be good enough for anyone. I feel like people always want to hurt me. People joke about me being paranoid but they don't realise how bad it is, my boyfriend often jokes about meeting up with guys because he knows I'm just paranoid but a lot of the time, I often believe there's some truth to his jokes
  2. I know exactly how you feel, you keep yourself busy to avoid having to deal with it but as soon as you have a moment alone it's all you think about! If you ever need to talk, my inbox is free
  3. Been so in sync with someone that it scares you but makes you cry with laughter at the same time? Me and my boyfriend were just talking briefly about Gagas Telephone video and out of nowhere after a pause both started saying "you've been a bad girl Gaga" without any warning, we just looked at each other with our eyes wide open and then started laughing.. It was sooooo trippy! And we said it in unison
  4. Thanks baby! I just got my new car too!! Today is a good day
  5. My boyfriend got his A Level results today, and whilst he didn't get exactly what he wanted (a uni quite far away) he still managed to get into his back up uni which is a lot closer so he'll be living at home still, it's a huge relief for both of us and he still gets to take part in a pretty good course that caters to everything he needs and I get to keep my boyfriend around. I'm so proud of him. A huge weight has been lifted for us both!
  6. I don't go to the gym... I just eat
  7. I already did crash my last car.. It wasn't a laughing matter
  8. I'm paying for it out of my compensation money from my accident, cba with finance companies
  9. Shady bitch
  10. I guess I'll just claim Amelia Lily for myself...
  11. The Saturdays - Headlines Tour - Six-D, Twenty Twenty The Saturdays - All Fired Up Tour - NVS, Oh My! The Saturdays - Greatest Hits Tour - Bribry, SD*Jem, Beth Sherburn Cheryl Cole - A Million Lights Tour - Tinchy Stryder Girls Aloud - TEN Tour - Amelia Lily One Direction - Take Me Home Tour - 5SOS Little Mix - DNA Tour - The Mend, ReConnected, Loveable Rogues Little Mix - Salute Tour - MO, NVS, Harvey Little Mix - Get Weird Tour - JAGMAC, Nathan Sykes Lady Gaga - ArtRAVE x2 - Lady Starlight, Breedlove Years & Years - Communion Tour - MØ, Mabel.. And another
  12. It's actually pretty good/clear for a filter, well done
  13. Did you pretty much add the backing vocals from the stems to the CD rip of the instrumental?
  14. They're alright, your lower notes compliment Aris high notes. You sound a bit nasal though
  15. Heart Attack and Youth sound so good together
  16. A lot of us struggle with depression but not many people talk about it. I'm here to share my story; I've suffered from depression for about 7-8 years and I've never seaked treatment for it, I've fought through every dark spell I've had, even when I've been at my lowest. Lately, I've felt myself slipping back into a very dark place that I've been in several times before. My boyfriend leaves for university in 3 weeks and it's the first time we've ever been apart for so long. I'm very insecure and always feel like people won't want me. My dark times do include self harm and self-distruction, I sit in my bedroom all day everyday doing nothing and just spiralling into a whirlwind of thoughts and feelings. It's difficult to keep fighting when you feel like you're doing it alone and you don't have anybody to express these feelings to. My boyfriend knows about my depression, however, he's never witnessed how bad it can get. He says he'll be there for me but whilst I believe him, I also can't help but think, how can he be? He'll be living in a different county with over 100 miles between us and if he doesn't understand how bad it can get, how can he help? so there's my story If you're suffering from depression, open up and share your story. If you don't want to post it on here publicly, you are more than welcome to inbox me. You're not alone, you have me. love, kisses and best wishes xx
  17. The finance company are being assholes because I'm only on a 15 hour contract with work so it'll be a while yet
  18. We're meeting with the undertaker today to arrange her funeral
  19. I'm getting it on Wednesday but my sisters boyfriend is driving it back because I've never driven that far before and they're really busy motorways. I will post pics
  20. .
  21. I'm ok, just been drinking so managed to let out some of the emotion. We don't know exactly what was wrong with her but her organs began shutting down gradually
  22. I've just been to see her in the hospital, she looks peaceful enough, I guess
  23. We've been expecting it over the past couple of weeks but she passed away about half an hour ago
  24. Delete please. I've decided I'm not going to post anymore, apparently I just attract trolls
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